The Outsders: The Lost Version
by GreaserFreak13
Summary: A collection of very random Outsiders parodies. It is not making fun of The Outsiders in any way. Well, maybe a little, I don't know. If you want a laugh, read this. DON'T OWN THE OUTSIDERS! Rated for safety.
1. SpiderSoda

The Outsiders: The Lost Version

An Outsiders Parody

Scene: Two-Bit, Johnny and Soda in the Curtis living room. Enter Pony.

**Pony:** Hey guys! What's going on? Notices Johnny JOHNNY?!?!? I thought you were DEAD!

**Johnny:** Nah man. It was just a few burns, nothing major.

**Pony:** I watched you die!

**Johnny:** Nope. You watched me fall asleep.

**Soda: **Yeah...where were you in the last week?

**Pony:** Oo

**Two-Bit: **Alright, I've been quiet long enough. PONYBOY, YOU ARE CRAZY! (Runs from the room)

**Soda:**(in an Australian accent) WTF mate?

**Pony: **Now your gonna tell me Dally's alive, too.

**Johnny:** Why wouldn't Dally be alive?

**Soda:** (whispers to Johnny) Don't tell Pony but I think Two-Bit is right...

**Johnny:** (nods)

**Pony:** I HEARD THAT!

**Soda:** Heard what?

**Pony**: What you just said about Two-Bit being right!

**Soda:** Two-Bit was never here.

**Pony:** Yes he was! He was, I tell you! Wasn't he Johnny?

**Johnny**: Um...

**Pony:** SAY YES YA DAMN PUPPY!

**Johnny:** Oo (whispers to Soda) Yeah...Two-Bit is definitely right.

**Pony: **See? HE WAS HERE!

**Johnny: **NO HE WAS NOT! TWOBIT WAS NEVER HERE! BUT HE IS RIGHT! YOU ARE SOOO CRAZY! (runs away)

**Pony and Soda**: oO

**Soda:**(in an Australian accent) WTF mate?

**Pony:** Um...

**Soda:** Um...

**Pony:** What?

**Soda:** What?

**Pony:** Shut up.

**Soda:** Shut up.

**Pony:** Okay, stop it right now.

**Soda:** Okay, stop it right now.

**Pony:** SODAPOP CURTIS STINKS!

**Soda:** SODAPOP CURTIS SMELLS GOOD!

**Pony:** Ha!

**Soda:** Ha!

**Pony:** (groans)

**Soda:** (groans)

**Pony:** STOP IT RIGHT NOW! I AM NOT CRAZY AND I'M GONNA MAKE A DRAMATIC EXIT! (He does, indeed, make a dramatic exit, but it was made less dramatic by him saying he was going to make a dramatic exit. So there, Ponyboy!)

**Soda:**(in an Australian accent) WT...(In a normal voice)Aww, screw it. (Stomps off angrily.)

(Enter Two-Bit)

**Two-Bit**- Hey Pony I was just gonna say... (Sees no one there) Oh fine! Don't listen to my apology! (Stomps off angrily, much like Soda did three lines ago.)

(Enter random dog.)

**Random Dog:** Woof.

(Enter Darry.)

**Darry:** (notices dog) SODA! WHAT IS A DOG DOING IN MY LIVING ROOM?

**Random Dog:** Woof Bark Bark Woof.

**Soda:** (in his and Pony's room) Uh-oh! Darry's mad! I better use my spidey powers to get out of here! (He uses his spidey powers to get out of there.)

**Pony:** Am I the only on sane around here? Darry's seeing dogs and Soda turned into Spiderman.

**Soda:** (yells from far away) NO! YOU'RE THE ONLY CRAZY ONE!

**Pony:** Whatever. (Walks away.)

**Soda:** (singing)SpiderSoda, SpiderSoda does whatever a SpiderSoda does.


	2. SpiderSoda Part Two

**SpiderSoda, Part Two**

(Set: Ponyboy in the living room, reading Gone with the Wind or Great Expectations. I can't see the damn title. PONY! MOVE YOUR HAND!!! (Ponyboy moves hand) Thank you. Okay and the winner is...drum roll please...Gone with the Wind! Thank you for playing What Book is That! You win 0$! Oh...okay...my director person thingy just told me to get back to the set. Wait director person, I am already done. Thank you, I am really totally done now!)

**Pony:** (looks up at the set paragraph) Who the freak wrote that?

**Me:** I did, thank you very much

**Pony:** (smirks) Self Insertation, ah? (sarcastic) _Very_ original.

**Me:** (beams) Thank you! Now I know why you're my favorite!

**Pony:** You're beaming, huh? Does that mean, like, rafter beams or beams of light...

**Me:** HOW ARE YOU READING THIS?!?!?!?!

**Pony:** Because _I'm_ SPECIAL!

**Me:** But I'm the author and I didn't make you special. I made Soda special.

**Pony:** How'd you make Soda special?

**Me:** He has spidey powers!

**Pony:** Oh. Yeah. Were you on crack or something? Who would do that?

**Me:** No I was not! I'm only 12 and I do not live in Philadelphia! (**Me:** no offence, Mr. Random Philadelphian. **Mr. Random Philadelphian:** Yet I'm still offended. **Me:** But I said no offence! So you shouldn't be offended!)

**Pony:** But if you made Soda special why aren't I special?

**Me:** Because I'm the author and I said so.

**Pony:** Good point.

**Me:** Thank you. Now I will un-self insert myself out of this fic/parody thingy. (And I do just that!)

(Enter Soda)

**Soda:** SPIDERSODA'S BACK! Can I sing my song again?

**Pony:** No!

**Soda:** Well...You can be BatPony!

**Pony:** (mutters) So NOW she makes me special.

**Soda:** What?

**Pony:** Nothing! Okay, I'll be BatPony.

**Soda:** Danananananana BATPONY!

**Pony:** SpiderSoda, SpiderSoda does whatever a SpiderSoda does!

**Soda:** I'm not SpiderSoda anymore, I'm Harry Pepsi.

**Pony:** No. You're still SpiderSoda.

**Soda:** (sighs) Okay. But YOU'RE still BatPony.

**Pony:** I know.

**Soda:** Well...okay then.

(Awkward silence)

(Enter Johnny)

**Johnny:** Pony, I love you!

**Soda and Pony:** Wrong story.

**Johnny:** This isn't that Pony/Johnny slash story...you know...the one...

**Pony:** Which one?

**Johnny:** I don't know! I'll go find it.

**Pony:** You do that.

**Johnny:** I will.

**Soda:** Okay then.

**Johnny:** I'm really going.

**Pony:** Alright then.

**Johnny:** I'm gonna go out that door and I'm and I'm not coming back in.

**Pony:** Have fun.

**Johnny:** I will, and I'm not...

**Soda and Pony:** LEAVE!

**Johnny:** Okay...sheese... (leaves...finally)

**Pony:** Where were we?

**Soda:** Right here. (Points to the line before the one that says Enter Johnny)

**Pony:** Oh...right. Awkward silence.

(another awkward silence)

**Soda:** I'm hungry. You want some chocolate cake?

**Pony:** Yeah, that's all we eat.

**Soda:** True.

(Enter Fry from Futerama)

**Fry:** Is this the year 3000?

**Soda:** Nope. 1967...or something like that.

**Fry:** Oh. Okay.

(Fry leaves, in search of the year 3000. Not the Jonus brothers' song, the actual year)

**Pony:** I believe we were at...chocolate cake?

**Soda:** Who was that guy?

**Pony:** Some guy from a show in the 2007

**Soda:** But he was looking for the year 3000.

**Pony:** The show's set in the future.

**Soda:** Oh...okay. So...chocolate cake?

**Pony:** Of course.

TBC...with Part Three! Haha, that rhymed!


	3. SpiderSoda Part Three

**SpiderSoda Part Three**

Set: The Curtis living room, because the Curtis living room rocks. Pony is in the living room...reading a special book you have never heard of. It's called... The Outsiders! Not! It's Gone with the Wind. If you've ever read it, I give you props. SHUT UP MR. DIRECTOR PERSON! THIS IS MY THIRD UPDATE OF THE DAY SO I CAN MAKE THE SET PARAGRAPH LONG IF I WANT TO! As I was saying...I've never read it but I will someday. Now, this goes out to the one and only Sammy-Wisconsin Angel because she is so awesome. YES THAT DOES BELONG IN THE SET PARAGRAPH BECAUSE I SAID IT DID, MR. DIRECTOR PERSON! And Mr. Random Philadelphian is dead. He OD'd.)

(Enter Everyone except Ponyboy because he's already in the living room...or is he? 'Cuz he entered with the rest of the gang.)

**Soda:** (notices the two Pony's) BatPony! You don't have cloning powers!

**Pony:** Yes I do.

**Clone Pony:** How do you explain me?

**Soda:** Wait...you ADMIT you're not the real Pony?

**Clone Pony:** Yeah...

**Soda:** Clones NEVER do that.

**Pony**: Well MY clone is SPECAIL

**Me:** You just keep thinking that, Ponyboy.

**Pony:** What?

**Clone Pony:** (looks around) Where did she go?

**Two-Bit:** SHOW YOURSELF!

**Me:** I'm right here.

**Pony:** Oh. It's YOU again.

**Me:** You know, I don't know why you're my second favorite?

**Darry:** Who's your first favorite?

**Me:** I'll tell you if the other...um..._less_ favorite characters don't beat me up.

**Dally:** (cracks knuckles) We'll see about that...

**Steve:** (grits teeth) Yeah...

**Me:** (smugly) Okay then, I'm not telling you!

**Dally:** Fine!

**Steve:** (muttering)

**Me:** WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?!

**Steve:** (scared) Nothing...nothing!

**Narrator:** And a lightning bolt unexpectedly stuck Steve, and hi corpse was run over by a train.

**Me:** Yeah! (And it happens. You know...that thing the narrator said...all that junk about Steve and everything...)

**Soda:** YOU KILLED MY BEST FRIEND!

**Me:** But you're my favorite!

**Soda:** Oh. Okay then.

(Awkward silence...again)

**Soda:** Would you stop making those awkward silences? They're awkward!

**Me:** If you wish. (bites lip)

**Soda:** I know what you're thinking.

**Me:** (innocently) What?

**Soda:** You're gonna put another awkward silence right under the next line.

**Me:** No! I swear!

**Soda:** Really?

**Me:** No!

**Soda:** Oh...okay.

**The whole gang, excluding Soda**: Queue the awkward silence!

**Me:** No...We don't need it after that.

**Dally:** Whatever. I'm gonna go do stuff.

**Clone Pony:** I'll come with you.

**Me:** Narrator?

**Narrator:** And Clone Pony dies.

**Me:** How?

**Narrator:** I don't know! You're the writer!

**Me:** Fine! (grumbles) If you want a character killed right you've got to do it yourself... (pours water on Clone Pony)

**Clone Pony:** No! I'm melting! (Clone Pony is reduced to a puddle on the floor)

**Dally:** Anybody else wanna come? (steps in Clone Pony) Eww! I got Ponyboy on my shoe!

**Pony:** (laughs) No...You got _Clone_ Ponyboy on your shoe!

**Dally:** Whatever.

**Johnny: **I'm Johnny!

**Soda:** We know this.

**Johnny:** Um...SpiderSoda, SpiderSoda! Does whatever a SpiderSoda does!

**Soda:** Good save.

**Pony:** But what about BatPony?

**Soda**: It didn't catch on.


	4. SpiderSoda Part Four

**SpiderSoda Part Four**

**Soda: **It's an UPDATE!!!

**Me:** Yeah.

**Soda:** But why didn't you update?

**Me**: Not my fault. I was on Vacation!

**Soda:** Oh, okay then. You go have fun on vacation and leave us in this unfinished story! You do just that you unselfish person! Hey! You put a Un in front of selfish!

**Me:** Yeah.

**Soda:** Why?!?!?!

**Me:** I'm the writer.

**Soda:** Well, don't alter my words!

**Me:** Why not?

**Pony:** Wait...I just realized something...you got home from vacation on September 2ed!

**Me:** And then school started.

**Pony:** So? You never got homework this week!

**Me:** Yeah I did! My parents had to sign, like, 50 kajillion papers.

**Soda:** But that's your parents!

**Me:** And I had to remember to take them back in.

**Pony:** Wait...what grade are you in?

**Me:** 7th.

**Pony:** And you're in advanced language arts, right?

**Me:** It's called Humanities, and yes.

**Pony:** Then why'd you just use the word kajillion?

**Me:** I don't know! I'm leaving.

**Pony and Soda:** Yay!

**Me:** Hey! (leaves)

**Soda:** She's gone!

**Pony:** Why are we happy?

**Soda:** 'Cuz we don't like her.

**Pony:** But why?

**Soda:** 'Cuz we hate all the authors who write parodies like this.

**Pony:** Oh. Right.

**Soda:** So...chocolate cake?

**Pony:** I'M SICK OF CHOCOLATE CAKE!!!!!!

**Soda:** (gasps) You CAN'T be sick of chocolate cake!

**Pony:** But I am.

**Soda:** No!

**Pony:** Yes.

**Soda:** But why?

**Pony:** Because we have it in every damn fan fiction every damn time we eat!

**Soda:** Good point.

(enter Tim)

**Tim:** WTF...

**Soda:** (tackles Tim) MY LINE! DON'T YOU SAY MY LINE!

**Tim:** Okay, okay! (runs away screaming)

(awkward silence)

**Soda:** Where's Johnny when you need him?

**Pony:** Dunno.

**Soda:** SpiderSoda, SpiderSoda...

**Pony:** That's getting old.

**Soda:** Yeah.

**Pony:** End of SpiderSoda.

**Soda:** This chapter was really short.

**Johnny:** Yeah.

**Soda:** (in an Australian accent) WTF, mate?


	5. The Title Is Really Long

**A Parody That Tries To Have A Plot And Also With an Extremely Long And Annoying Name **

[Scene- In the Curtis House. Two-Bit, Johnny and Pony are watching...that restarted show where the mouse dances around in an annoyingly high squeaky voice...oh, yeah, Mickey Mouse.

**Two-Bit:** HEY! MICKEY MOUSE IS NOT RETATED! -pause- Where is she?

**Johnny:** Dunno, man.

**Pony:** She was here earlier. Said to tell **all of you that this will be continued under the username GreaserAtHeart and the name What Happened to The Outsiders? And Other Parodies.** So search GreaserAtHeart and the next chapter shall appear as soon as she writes it tomorrow. So...

**Two-Bit:** That was long...

**Johnny:...**and pointless.

Pony: Well, it was an IMPORTANT author's note! So it was not pointless.

**Two-Bit**: MY PARENTS WEDDING SONG IS ON THE RADIO RIGHT NOW! LIKE, OMG! (A/N- True!)

**Johnny:** REALLY?!?!?!?

**Two-Bit:** Yeaz!

**Johnny:** That's hot.

**Two-Bit:** I know!

**Pony:** Done yet?

**Johnny and Two-Bit:** NO!

**Pony:** Well...this chapter'll end here.

Johnny: Meg just told me to tell you **she's sorry it's really short but she wants to write the next chapter...and remember what Pony said about the username thing because it is so important and she hopes you will keep reading.**

**Two-Bit:** NOT YOU!!

**Pony:** Bye Everyone, from Meg and The Outsiders! And have a happy and safe weekend!

Two-Bit: Meg told me to tell you all that TGIF, and also **the new story will be funnier because it won't be filled with author notes like this one. It will probably be in script format, to, because she finds that the easiest to write a parody in. **GAH! NO! NOT ME! And I got the _longest_! Boo!

**Johnny:** Bye!

**Pony:** **Bolded words are important!** And by again from meg'n'me'n'The Outsiders!


End file.
